Wednesday, May 14, 2014

so many feelings... but God...

My flesh and my heart may fail, BUT GOD
is the strenth of my heart and my portion forever.
Psalm 73:26



Life has a way of happening all at one time it seems... or so I thought. What I've found is I really didn't have a clue what "life" could bring. We know that right... we know we have it "good" and we count our blessings yet we...well, I have a tendency to live in this "I'm so stressed, life is rough" mode. BUT I will count my blessings and be thankful while still hanging on to this "poor pitiful me" attitude.

Wake up one morning and then...
BAM

Life has now changed. The new normal is so out of reach... beyond reality and yet, it's real. ALL. TO. REAL. People deal with grief in their own way. None of them "wrong"... just different. For me, take all of those ways and combine them because on any given day I can deal with it differently. I'm just "fun" like that. Up until today I have withdrawn, not really ready to talk per say. Today, it has been a feeling of needing to write this out. Will it make it more clear? I doubt it... but maybe it will gather some prayers and show others they are NOT ALONE!!!!

A little history behind all of these ramblings...

Precious friends were in an accident on Monday. Mom was driving, 4 kids in the vehicle. Sweet lil Micah (5) went to be with Jesus. Sarah (9, in Birmingham) and Rebekah (7 in Huntsville) are in very critical condition. Mom and baby girl have been discharged. Sweet Asher and Lilah are being cared for and loved on.

My reaction is irrelevant in this... but I know like everyone... we can't wrap our heads around this and we find ourselves saying "what happened?", "what do we do?". We go to the only place we know to go, God's Word. Our only constant.
He has never failed. No, I don't understand... it's beyond human understanding. A friend said "I have to believe God, I have to... there is nothing else" To believe God is to KNOW His ways are higher than ours and He loves His children. I'm holding on to that!

Romans 8:18
For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us.

Isaiah 41:10
Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.

You can go here to see updates. Please pray with us! So many hurting.

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/thebrownfamily2

Recently, I watched a miracle be performed in my Dad's life. Being on the door of death, God chose to heal his body. I KNOW miracles happen. I also know in God's sovereignty it is His will in the end. There just is no human way of understanding. We grab on to His truths and we pray! We humbly pray!